"Way down in the jungle deep, the lion stepped on the signified monkey's feet..."
Dolemite had a way with words, that's for sure. Well so does Pastor Skip from Calvary Chapel. Pastor Skip once told a story about a man, a lion, and a gorilla, that went a little something like this:
A man named Mic Huge Éttooadees had lost his job, and was on the look for a new one. Mic went everywhere in search of any line of work that he could find. His family was in need, and their funds were fading fast. Desperately Mic went to the zoo, and spoke with the lead keeper, Mr. C. J. Helpanîmales. Mic said he would shovel dung, clean habitats, whatever they needed. C.J. with deep regret, informed the Mic that he had no openings. At that moment, another keeper ran in, and pronounced an unfortunate event. The assistant keeper informed the C.J., that their gorilla Big Moe had passed away. C.J. quickly turned and called the 6'9" 350lb Mic back. C.J. explained to Mic that Big Moe had passed, and that there was a group of school children coming to see him. So, C.J. hired Mic to bury Big Moe, and put on a gorilla suit and perform for the children. Mic retrieved the shovel and all of the tools he needed to lay Big Moe to rest and also had a moving eulogy for the big gorilla, then Mic climbed into the fur suit to portrait the late zoological icon. C.J. led Mic to the gorilla habitat, and told him not to speak, and just be playful with the children. Mic was beside himself, and ready to perform! Mic went in and examined his area diligently and noticed the lions den just below his habitat. Mic climbed the massive tree in his exhibit and noticed a trapeze on one of the larger branches. Mic walked out cautiously to the big swing, grabbed the wooden dowel fastened to two thick ropes, and began to swing. Mic perched on the branch, looked playfully out at the children first, then down at the lion, and thought to himself, "King of the jungle huh?" Mic pounded his chest and bellowed out at the lion. The lion paced below, looked up, and roared ferociously! Mic kept swinging, and pounding his chest, suddenly and unfortunately Mic lost his grip and plummeted into the lions den! The impact momentarily knocked the breath out of Mic, so he couldn't cry out even if he wanted to. The lion stalked him, almost as if to torment him for mocking him from above. The lion inched closer, and closer, and Mic crawled away from him trying to catch his breath, and regain his composure. He scampered backwards frantically until his back hit the concrete barrier. The lion placed one huge paw over Mics shoulder and roared! Mic fought with every ounce of courage in his being to keep from screaming, now that he had his wind back, because he didn't want to disappoint the children or the zookeepers. Then the lion placed the other paw over his shoulder, and let out another ferocious roar. It was at that moment Mic cracked, and screamed, "Please, please someone stop him!"The lion quickly placed one of his paws over Mics mouth and whispered in his ear, "SHUT UP man, what are you trying to do get us both fired!?"
And the moral of this story is that things aren't always what they seem.
Part 2 hopefully tomorrow... on the Imperfect Christian Blog... The imperfect one will share an experience that taught a valuable lesson.
