Blogwizer (BW) speaks with the families in this blog. Married couples (MC), as well as single mothers (SM), single fathers (SF), even the children (CH), and here's what they all have to say:
BW: What does it feel like not having your mom or dad around everyday?
CH: It's hard because the other kids ask about what your dad does, and you say, you don't know, because you don't.
BW: So then you don't know what he does for work, or for fun, none if that right?
CH: Yep.
BW: Do the other kids pick on you at school because your father is away from home?
CH: He's not away, he don't live with us. They don't say nothin' it was just sad for me when all the other kids said their dad's (were) with them and what they did, and I couldn't say nothin'.
BW: What do you think you would like most about having both parents at home?
CH: Someone to teach me things.
BW: Like what?
CH: How to understand better.
BW: Understand better? What things?
CH: Football and mama.
BW: It's very important to understand those things. How could your father help you understand your mother and football better?
CH: (He could) Tell me why she cries sometimes and don't (doesn't) talk to me (during the crying). [Fighting back tears at this point, wishing a hug could cure the pain!]
BW: Does your mom ever say why she's crying, or say that it's your dad that makes her cry?
CH: I just know she works a lot and talks about the rent, and cooking. We don't have as much money. She don't talk about him at all.
BW: How do you feel about your father? Do you think he is good or bad?
CH: I don't know. I don't really know him. He's never around.
BW: Does he send you letters, or call when he's not around?
CH: Nope.
BW: Does he send you things for your birthday or holidays like Christmas?
CH: No.
BW: How does that make you feel?
CH: I would like to have him teach me football. I don't need nothin' else. I do good in school, I ain't in no trouble, I (would) just like to have him to talk to. Sometimes, though, I like it with just me and mama.
BW: You really like football, that's good. If you're glad your father is not there at times can't your mother practice with you?
CH: I looove football! I'm gonna break Peyton Mannings records! Mama's ok, she don't watch me play, and don't practice with me. She's a girl, so I understand that part. I just wish my dad was here to teach me stuff like changing plays and how to get faster and stronger. Mama always cooks or says she's tired from working. My dad could practice with me when she cooked. But with him gone, I ain't got nobody to boss me around.
BW: It's tough missing your dad, I wish that I could've talked with my dad before he died. I'm here if you ever need to talk hoss. I love ya.
CH: I don't miss him, I just wish he was here, but I'm glad he's not sometimes. I love you too. How did your daddy die, was he old?
BW: He was sick and about my age. I didn't know how to miss him either. My mother never spoke much about my dad either. So perhaps we can help each other and help others like ourselves (you and me), in the future?
CH: You help me when you talk to me. You're like a big brother. You're nice. You're a good dad (referring to me and my children I believe).
BW: [Big lump in my throat, fighting with everything in me not to cry] Thanks hoss, you are a great young man, and hopefully you'll be an awesome dad one day too. Take care of your mama, and let me know if I can help.
CH: Great, I need help with passing. Maybe you can come over and be Eric Decker one day?
After much debate on why I would never play for the Broncos we agreed to be there for each other.
His mother never bad mouths his dad, and for that I was grateful. No one wants anyone to remind them that a portion of them is faulty or worthless, especially a child. I'm a morale booster, not a morale buster. Regardless of whether or not he's present, he's still that boys father and that kid deserves better than to grow up thinking he's damaged because of a broken or damaged dad! Think (both parents) before you lash out. It's not just about you, you need to be mature enough to see how it affects your child.
Peace to all, and I'm out.
