Just Like A Woman
Her father told her story first. Her love tells it most. Her Heavenly Father, and First love tells it truest, and has the last say. She loves her earthly father, but she was never good enough in her own eyes based on what her father told her growing up. She was never good enough and could have done things differently according to her recollection of daddy. What she failed to understand was that he only wanted to be her harshest critic because he loved her enough not to settle for mediocrity. Great fathers don't want great things for their daughters, they want what's best for them. That's the best dad anyone could ever have. Unfortunately, she learned to do just that, to settle for mediocrity because she didn't see what daddy saw, she saw what her pain led her to see. Her pain led her to see that it was most fitting to settle. Settling helps find an ease in the pain, a quick remedy to the pain. Which led her to settle all her life, to avoid the pain at all costs, to settle for allowing the ghost of her past to haunt her.
If she's not good enough for daddy, perhaps she can find a father figure that will make her forget she's not good enough by having him tell her that nothing outside of him (the father figure) is good enough? He's smart enough to temporarily tickle her ears, so he has to be the smartest man she knows. How will she handle the lies? When will she see the truth? The lies of... the money is not good enough, the affection is not good enough, the physical relationship is not good enough. He needs more from more, more money (more theft), more affection (more women), more for the flesh (more substances/addictions). She is so used to the lies that she feels as though she has to stay trapped inside that tiny earthly body, and still figure out a way to hold the weight of the world on her shoulders. Then when she tries to take on the weight of the world, she experiences the weight of the universe, and it is there that she has an encounter with God. A feminine, Job, why me moment.
"Lord, I've been telling You ("telling" is often confused as prayer), I want one of these play things, (a man that she can manipulate like an older sibling blackmailing the younger sibling to get out of more choice situations, or get into situations they really don't want to be a part of), so I'm gonna rub Your bottle (Bible or imaginary subconscious bottle), You play genie, give me what I want, and I promise to be a good girl," she demands!
He replies, "Two questions for you little woman, dear little sweet child of mine, Why start now, what are you really praying for? You've continually taken matters into your own hands, why stop now?" Why do we start prayer, and why should we end disobedience, and making vain request? To receive our blessings, to do the right thing, to get out of His way, and let Him be life, love, and the joy in us, through us, and for us.
Even though He doesn't have to, God still hears, so when will we? I've been praying for someone just like you!!! Did you hear you, or did you hear God? Did God say, "I've heard your prayers, and now the answer is in you. Seek Me in him, and you will get closer to him as you get closer to Me. "Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and His righteousness, and all this things shall be added to you" (Matthew 6:33 KJV). Yes all these things, the man, the diamond on the finger, the nice home (not just a house), and all! You were almost a wife, don't let satan still anymore of your joy. Don't seek the desire you want in a man, it's temporal, don't stay focused on the pain of a past man, this too should, and shall pass as you let it!!! Instead seek the God in him that was created for you, and find the love of a lifetime.
Peace, Blessings, and Joy... that real PB&J |
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