Pretending

Big purple dinosaurs influence some of us to use too much imagination and not enough reality. We pretend to be a friend, but then we don't have time for our friends. We pretend to care about people, but are so carefree that we become careless enough to become uncaring and rude. Some people will go as far as to lie to one another and pretend not to be interested in another's caring or compassion then they observe the other individual (stalk) them for the sole purpose of the self-indulgence in ego tripping. Yes ego trippin'! They watch you just to see if they're hurting you, or if they're getting to you. What's good is that the purple dinosaur can't trump a purple clad spirit. Don't pretend to care, no instead prove that you do care. The imperfect Christian's spirit is in tune with a greater spirit. That spirit is the Holy Spirit. 

In the first pic, that's an image of a great friend (a brother of mine), and myself. In the second pic, it's actually the two of us, not a reflection, or refraction. We don't have to pretend that we are there for one another. We are actually there for one another. 

When I say I don't need Facebook to appreciate this brother, I'm sincere in that. I don't have to follow him on Twitter or lie to him about losing my password (both of us knowing I can retrieve it in my email), to keep from helping him out by following him and trying to be stealth and stalk him without his knowledge of it. 

Do we agree to disagree? Sure, but we don't pretend to be something we aren't. We're friends for life and we have taken and take time to grow as friends. That's what good friends do. That's how good relations are conducted. Whether it be public, private, or otherwise, that's how rational people conduct themselves. When I was a child I spake as a child (I cursed without caring, I talked without thinking, I talked vulgar and partook in like events), I understood as a child (my understanding was that as long as it was good for me, that's all that mattered), I thought as a child (I thought it was ok to rush into things, that it was ok to say one thing, then do another), but when I became a man, I put away childish things. (Sometimes the childish things will put themselves away, let them be done, let them stay lying, and if you have to put them away yourself, then put them away and do not look back. Do not look back just rejoice and be glad that you're not the one having to figure out how it was that you missed and allowed things to go so wrong, that it had to be put away in the first place.
I Corinthians 13:11

Pretending leaves you in a fantasy, not a fantastic voyage. Happy sailing realist. Happy drifting without a sail pretender.

Transitioning... One Bad Brotha - A Few Good Men

I remember each summer as a teen, I would step through my doorway and feel the warmth of the California sun and think:

It's a great day to be alive, if for no other reason, simply because it's a great day to be in the water.

My routine consisted of in the water (beach or pool didn't matter), for 30 minutes, then lounge in the sun to warm back up for 10-15 minutes, then back to the board, or the swim. Laughing, cutting up with friends, man what a life! Then abruptly, like mom walking in and turning the TV off in the middle of your favorite show because homework wasn't finished/started, comes the coolest breeze of summer. This is Mother Natures way of telling you that Father Time tapped her and said, "Time for the happy dance before we 'Fall!" Fall get it? Ok not in the mood for corn? I'll have to feed you with something else then, I suppose.

Life, like nature's seasons all have periods of transitioning. The same holds true for ones theatrical life. I went from playing a part of a few unruly, "bad" men in Peter Pan as Bill Jukes the notorious pirate, to being a good man, as the constable "Horace" in Drood, to joining "A Few Good Men." Oh, and one great lady. 

The "Playhouse" is my home field, it like Berry Chapel was for my ministry is where I cut my teeth. The transition has been fabulous, and here it is in "A Few Good Pictures:"

Peter Pan - I was in a cast of crazies (A Few Bad Men), and for the record, Bill Jukes is resting, and very much alive!

The Mystery of Edwin Drood - The H man, "Horace" the constable in with (A Few Even Badder Men), because it's not 'bad' meaning 'bad,' but 'bad' meaning 'good,' and the term "worse" just wouldn't fit well here. 

Drood had a few fab (great) ladies, as did Petey Pan with Pan being a lady... 

A Few Good Men - I have the privilege of working with a fine Marine MP, Cpl. Dunn, my son TC in this one. 

What ever the season is, whatever the transition, move forward and embrace each phase. Woody Hood, Andrew Gall, thank you for allowing me to work under the tutelage of true professionalism in a way that allows any actor to have fun! You both build on creativity, rather than limit it! I am grateful. To the cast, actors, interns, managers, and technicians much love to you all, it has been an awesome ride! Ok y'all I've got to get to lines, I've got a lot of work to do yet... See you in Washington DC, I've got a few guys to put away!

Marine Lt. "Smiling" Jack Ross

A Few Good Men

The Final Love Story

The imperfect Christian has a story that may be a bit graphic for younger audiences, so be forewarned as a parent.

The imperfect Christian was reminiscing over a dear friend, one that knew no limits in love. This friend was the most compassionate, humanitarian anyone could ever meet.  The friend became a best friend, a major influential figure, and a mentor. The imperfect one remembers his friend announcing in a formal letter (a final love story) that it was time for their departure. It was one of the saddest times a person could ever endure. The imperfect Christian was losing the perfect friend.

Imagine your best friend saying that they were going to move several hours away. Imagine going to an empty house, and not finding your best friend there, or the love of a lifetime there. Imagine you've lost your job. Imagine finding a suicide note with the follow bits of information:

The doctor has informed me that I have cancer. My spouse left me, and has taken our children 900 miles away. I have endured being abusing daily, both verbally and physically. My spouse has cheated on me, and I have experienced the pain of what it is like to cheat on a spouse. I love life, but I am so depressed that the thought of suicide rushes in like the flood waters from a heavy rain, on soft, rich, mountainous soil. On top of all of this, my friend, that is closer than any brother, told the people that hated me most, just where to find me, then the government has falsely accused me. They have tried me unjustly and now they are imprisoning me. I was in the theatre where couples were slain, I was in the school when children killed children, but none of them would come to me for cover. They wouldn't allow me to help. Now they won't treat me, and the only medicinal aid they will grant me, is a vile, bitter liquid. They are prepared to beat me, and have exposed me to the other belligerent souls here, and they have taken their hate out on me. I have endured: adultery, bullying, gender discrimination, genocide, murder, racism, rape, treason, and on and on... I had lost my job, battled depression, had my best friend set me up, and now I am walking a deeper green mile than Stephen King ever dreamed of. I am on death row, and I have every ailment, and form of disease known to mankind. Everything from aids to a toothache, and now the public despises me as well. As I sit here alone I can only pray that all of this is just a bad dream, and that there is some way out. When I wake up, this will all be over, and thing will be as they were, and everything will be ok, and I will know this not to be true. If there is anyway, I pray this not to be necessary!

The imperfect Christian first met this dear friend, as a child, at his grandmother's house. This friend has seen the imperfect Christian through lifes' struggles, time and time again. This friend never once turned their back on the imperfect one. The imperfect one was bitter at this friend, and this friend on a few occasions, and unlike any other friend, this friend stayed with the imperfect one even when he was less than perfect. From self murder, to murdering others, God knows your struggle. Ever wonder why God allowed His only begotten Son to die such a brutal death? Some say that Jesus, in a round about way, committed suicide because He didn't call on the legion of angels to destroy His captors.
Instead Jesus called His betrayer (Judas Iscariot) "friend!"
Jesus said to him, “Friend, why have you come?” Matt 26:50 (NKJV)

Then Jesus said to Peter:
"Put your sword in its place, for all who take the sword will perish by the sword. Or do you think that I cannot now pray to My Father, and He will provide Me with more than twelve legions of angels? Matt 26:52&53 (NKJV)

The imperfect Christian is not suggesting anyone commit suicide, but I am thinking that in this instance, THE Son of God was thinking of the son of perdition. Blasphemy against the Holy One, and denying yourself daily grace, (not believing in the SON), are the only unpardonable sins.

This is my final love story, because there is no other love, no other love like this.

Peace, Blessings, and Joy... that real PB&J 

All Good Things...

The old cliché is, "All good things must come to an end." True in a sense, but farthest thing from it, in another. Peter Pan came to a close, for me, on Jukeslie 13th. Bill Jukes is not dead, by the way, he is simply resting (until 5pm, then back to business with Drood)!

Peter Pan was reported as the second most successful production in the Playhouse's 67 year history. I am honored to be a part of that. According to Andrew Gall (Artistic Producing Director) not only was the cast represented by a diverse group, but there was also a very wide variety of representation with the viewing audience at this production as well. The show had people as far away as Hawaii come be part of the viewing audience. 

To be a part of this is such a blessing and I am grateful for the experience. I am grateful to have support from the family and friends that I have. Not everyone knows or understands what it's like to be able to appreciate a wonderful support group. I had an uncle from the California Bay Area, an aunt from Nevada, cousins from DC, an aunt from the Greensboro Triad Area, and friends that I haven't seen since high school and some newer, but very special friends come to support me. I love you all. But getting flowers from my kids, and having my baby girl bring me congratulatory candy was one of the greatest gifts/compliments that I could have ever received. I love you guys! 

My writing is not that of a man, or an actor that feels he has obtained celebrity status from his first play in years, rather it is a writing of great gratitude! A humble thank you to a great number of people that have made a significant impact on my life! 

I sat backstage in various places and felt the hearts and souls of a lot of good people. People that are now my stage siblings. The Lost Boys! Those young ones were, and will always be awesome to me. I pray that their love and dedication remains steadfast for the arts! My only word of advice to them would be this: 

Take your time, think things through, love your loved ones through the years, don't sweat the small stuff, and when you come of age to vote, vote for leaders that will help you pursue your dreams. You and all Americans have the right to the pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness. So a huge thanks to the Lost Boys for a wonderful experience. I know some of their parents very well, and love them all. I only pray that they don't ask them about any old stories that I might have shared with their parents, from our school days, and some after. (Smile) Hopefully they will, for now at least, reminisce with the story of Peter Pan. Kade Hoilman, I am especially speaking to you sir! 

The braves were great, and end the end gave us (the cast) all a reason to smile. Perhaps it was just me, but Taylor Hutchinson, aka "Tiger Lily," actually looked the part of a true Indian Princess! Then the roar of Lily Polgar (Little Big Panther), "They fear me!" That's a line that I will not soon forget! 

The Mermaids, smiled brightly, sang sweetly, and looked lovely. For such sweet group of creatures, they were almost as sinister as We The Pirates! Their desire to drown only a few Lost Boys is the only factor that places them in the backseat to being the most sinister characters in the play. They were as stunning as they were awesome, and I ask that they forgive us as we struggled to figure out when and who it was, that would carry them on stage, from time to time. 

Sitting backstage, and behind the window, I was only allowed to witness certain things early on in the show, but the laughter that came from the house (audience) was invigorating on the hot nights. Myra McCourry I admired from the view of her shadow, and voice! Myra did a great job as Pan! "You come out of there and apologize to me!" said Ms. McCourry (Pan) in a very boisterous tone, speaking to Tinkerbell, as she shook Havens clock violently. That portion of the play always received a hearty laugh. 

Izsie Hilbert I viewed and listened to through the set window. Iz, is a songbird! She is truly a talent and I look forward to being blessed with seeing her in many, many more productions! 

I also viewed (on the opposite side of the set window with her husband) the eyes of Mrs. Darling (Anna Franklin-Bailey), and her stage voice! Sophistication, professionalism, and elegantly industrious all wrapped into one! She did a wonderful job. 

There was a lot of good people, a lot of talented people, and a lot of generous people that made this a beautiful experience for me. Thank you all. 

Speaking of generous people... a huge thanks to all donors, and volunteers that make things possible. Without them, the arts, and the life as we artist know it, is not the same. Thank you donors and volunteers for the personal inspiration to pay it forward, and to give back as I can. The unspoken lessons are usually the most inspiring ones. 

I saw a few names on the bill that I know fairly well. Theresa Colletta... I remember delivering to at the Yancey library, and I am praying to deliver for her on stage now. She was one of the bright spots from my courier days! The Stella family, and I are even friends on Facebook now! (Smile) The Weinmeister's are in that same Facebook boat as well, it was a privilege to meet your families. 

Last but certainly not least:

I am thankful to my brothers in sinister, theatrical crime. I never dreamed that I would be involved in a production with such a diverse, yet contradictorily similar band of brothers. What do you get when you take a Presbyterian pastor, a UMC pastor/school teacher, a doctor, a lawyer, an English teacher, an awesome student and son to the UMC minister and teacher, a couple of interns, and some crazy eyed brotha that has done it all, and put them in a play together? You get one bad band of PIRATE BROTHERS! 

From the first fiasco in getting his Hook stuck in the wall, to the final plunge into the deep blue, and finally the last few moments after strike, and bidding each other farewell in the street, the good doctor was/is an awesome friend. Hopefully I'll see him down the road again at some point. Dr. Jeff Polgar, "I got to work with my daughter, that was pretty cool!" You sir are, "pretty cool!"

I am also hoping that my new and good friend Steven B, will be inspired to a Starkey and Jukes reunion often! I am having a short film flashback, and seeing him hoist that pistol like a periscope over our heads! I see the last signal and cue that he gave to me, and his smile! Steven Bailey is a good one!

Pastor Steve Elderbrock I'll be by to fellowship with I'm hoping very soon. He was an awesome Smee, and a true brother in Christ! "Rip!" Only Smee could unknowingly rattle Hook as he did! 

Mac, "the ship is bewitched!" Mr. Pauley, your secret is safe with me, what happens near the shop entrance, stays at the shop entrance! I hope I am able to catch up on some Chappelle Show, and talk music again. 

Ryan Robertson! This guy! Words do not do him justice! From the ghost of Nana to  Mullins and the quarter wrapped bandana, he helped keep me sane. It's a small world. We realized that our mothers knew each other from the hospital. When he hits the top I may need a place to hangout one day, "right down by da de beach, boiee!" 

Esquire Barry! Without him, we would have been... well in need of someone remembering his lines! I truly missed him at the final show, and I pray that he gets well soon, sir. It was an honor having him as a fellow pirate! 

Caleb G... in the words of Montel Jordan, "every since I was a lowercase g!" I'll one day say that I've known him since he was a lowercase g, to the uppercase G! Caleb is the man! He always got me stoked before every performance! I'll see him in Hollywood one day I'm sure, but for now, I'll catch you around here! 

Cecco, is my brotha from anotha motha! Thee Uppercase G! He shared show experience with me, as well as life experiences. I am blessed to have been embraced and as welcomed as I was by his family while we were on stage together. His baby girl an my baby girl admire each other, and I pray that we all will have many great years celebrating our friendship! 

Thanks to everyone involved in this production. Come see me in Drood next! July 27th - August 10th

Friendship Like the Sky

The critical thinker, thinks on high. 

The critical thinker, declares friendship is like the sky. 

The proud friend, like storm clouds attempt to overshadow all others. 

Your best friend, your child's friend, your sister, your brother. 

The proud friends say that they'll be right there. 

But like your last balloon ride, they're full of hot air. 

They need their space, but you need their best. 

You need your space, they won't let you rest. 

Seasons and hours most often do change. 

A so-called friend like the formation of clouds rearrange. 

The so-called stand in the way, they pour out life lessons. 

Your True Blu's listen, and pour out sweet blessings. 

Lying in a field on my back, looking to the sky, I watching the sun burn away, as it does everyday. I notice that the clouds are not consistent in shape or form, only in the fact that they fade away. I thought about the similarities between them all, and about friendship.

The sun comes and goes daily, but it's assured that the sun will come. Even if you abandon it, or even if you cannot see it because of the clouds, it's guaranteed that the sun is still there. The sun like a best friend, gives you time to rest, and takes time to take a break from you as well. The clouds are sporadic, and flighty. They provide temporary relief, possibly even from your best friend, but unlike the best friend, they dissipate and leave you with a blank space, a blue space, a void, that only the sun can fill. Friendship is like the sky in a sense. Feel the warmth of your best friend, enjoy the temporary satisfaction of your so-called friends, but by all means do not rely on them to help light your path in the days to come, regardless of how bright or dark the forecast says that those days will be. 

Going,

going,

and, 

gone!

Thanks for being there without my having to ask...